Why do we judge experiences in our lives as either good or bad, and what options are available to enable us to take control of our lives to start living through love and confidence instead of fear and worry?
Where do good and bad feelings come from?
All human actions are motivated at their deepest level by one of two emotions - fear or love. These are the only two emotions, the only two words in the language of the soul. There are many variations of love and fear, but if you stop to think about the route of our true feelings behind an action, you can trace it back to one of these two emotions.
How do we judge everything?
Love and fear are the two points which allow the system of relativity with which we judge everything in our lives to exist. Without these two ideas, no other idea could exist.
There is no other human motivation than these emotions, and all other ideas are just derivatives of these two.
If you think on this deeply, you will see that it is true.
Why do we judge everthing?
When we experience anything in our daily lives, we judge the experience immediately as either good or bad. We may not even know we’ve made that judgement at the time, but on reflection it’s obvious.
From the moment we’re born, we are taught that there are limits, restrictions, ways to behave, and the majority of these are there for someone else’s reasons. We are judged by others and so learn to judge using their standards - the largest influencer of our judging standards is our parents. Our parents are the gods of our universe as children.
Our parents taught us that love is conditional - you will remember feeling those conditions many times - and this is the experience we take into our own relationships.
Those occasions taught us that we are less than perfect and that we must put others feelings above our own to be loved.
How can we take control of our lives through changing the way we think?
So we make judgements of our experiences in our lives from someone else’s point of view. This is the first thing to recognise when trying to change our thought processes.
Once we recognise this, we can start to listen to our own real feelings about those experiences, and finally start creating our own reality through controlling our thoughts and judgements.
When you make a judgement of person or experience, have a think about what the driving emotion behind your decision is, check whether it truly matches with your feelings, or whether it stems from someone else’s standards.
The next step is to try to discard your judgements, and replace them with the judgement you would like to make.
For example:
If someone makes you feel bad by telling you you’re doing something wrong, or even if you think they might.
STOP.
Discard your initial judgement of the person or the situation, and think of a judgement which makes you feel good about the other person, about the situation and about yourself.
You’ll be amazed by the effect this simple process can have on your life.
